The Way We Were
by tutorgirl25
Summary: She left 10 years ago with a secret. After finding out a past love is sick, she returns to Newport. Will it ever be back to the way they were?
1. Prologue

Summary: 1o years after graduation. Marissa never died in the car accident. Seth and Summer are married, living in Newport Beach. Ryan is living in Newport Beach as well. Marissa is living in New York City.

"Jake, sweetheart, you're gonna be late for school if you don't hurry." The petite brunette yelled upstairs as she put her necklace on.

"Coming Mom!" the young boy ran down the stairs. He was a very handsome young boy, around 10 years old. He had light brown hair and big blue eyes. He grabbed his backpack and kissed his Mom on the cheek as a BMW pulled up in front of their penthouse and the young boy ran outside and jumped in the car, looking up to the window and waving to his mother.

Marissa Cooper lives with her son Jacob Cooper in New York City. She is a teacher at one of the best private schools in Manhattan. Her and her son live in a big penthouse in the Upper East Side and have lived there since Jake was born.

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"Cohen! Move it!" Summer screamed into the kitchen where her husband was reading the newspaper.

"Coming!" he smiled, walking out to his wife who was holding his briefcase and jacket "You look more like a watermelon every day." He commented.

"Yea, I've realized." She said to him, hitting him on the arm "You're gonna be late." She looked at his watch.

"Bye Sum, have fun at home." He said, kissing her lightly before leaning down to kiss her big belly "Bye baby."

After Seth left, Summer took out her phone, putting it up to her ear and sitting on the couch.

"Hello?" Marissa answered.

"Coop!" Summer squealed "Whatcha doin?"

"Lunch break."

"Sounds fun. So, I've been thinking of some names but as the godmother, and my best friend, you need to help." Summer propped her legs up onto the couch and put a pillow on her belly.

"Okay, what are they?" Marissa asked with a laugh.

Summer paused "Well, for a girl…" she started as there was a knock at the door "Hang on, someone's here." She slowly stood up, letting out a small groan, and walking to the front door. When she opened it, Ryan smiled and said hello.

"Can I call you back?" Summer asked Marissa "Ryan's here."

Marissa sighed "Yea, call me, okay?"

"I will." Summer supposed, hanging up the phone.

"Sorry, who was that?" Ryan asked, stepping inside.

"Um, no one." Summer said quickly "So, what's up?"

"Seth's not here, is he?" Ryan asked, looking anxious

"No, why? Is everything okay?" Summer asked, walking into the living room as Ryan followed.

"Yea." Ryan said unconvincingly.

"Well you can hang out until his lunch break in like two hours……or you can go food shopping with me." She asked with a smile.

Ryan sighed and stood back up "You know, once this baby is out, you're not getting special treatment anymore."

Summer laughed "Yea, we'll see about that." She grabbed the car keys and they drove to the store.

A few minutes before they arrived at the supermarket, Ryan turned pale.

"You okay?" Summer asked.

"I'm not feelin' so hot." Ryan held his stomach.

"Ryan Atwood! You better not be sick around me! I'm 8 months pregnant! I can't get sick!" Summer yelled at him.

"No, Summer, it's not contagious." Ryan said quickly, still pale.

Summer looked at him "What is it?"

"It's nothing."

"Ryan." She said severely.

Ryan sighed "I'll tell you and Seth when we get back to your house."

"Ryan. Now." Summer said.

Ryan paused "I'm sick Summer…..I have cancer."

Summer lost her breath for a second "Oh Ryan…." She took his hand.

Ryan shook his head "No, it's okay. I didn't want to tell anyone but I figured you and Seth should know."

Summer turned the car around and headed home "I'll call Seth, he'll meet us at home." She said, driving all the way home without saying a word.

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Marissa and Jake were sitting down for dinner. Monday night was Chinese night, Jake's favorite.

"So, did you have a good day at school?" Marissa asked Jake.

Jake nodded "Yep. I got an A on my math test!" he said happily.

"That's great, honey." Marissa was really proud of him.

The phone rang and Jake jumped up "Hello?" he answered.

"Hey Jake man." Seth said on the other end of the phone.

"Seth!" Jake said with a smile.

"Is your Mom there, buddy?" Seth asked.

"Yea, one sec." Jake handed the phone to Marissa.

"Hey Cohen." Marissa put the phone against her ear.

"Marissa, I need to talk to you. It's important." Seth said seriously, taking Marissa by surprise.

"Everything okay?"

Seth sighed "No, it's not."

"It's not the baby, right?" Marissa asked quickly, asking Jake to clear the plates and start his homework.

"It's Ryan." Seth said.

Marissa took a deep breath "Seth….."

Seth and Summer know not to mention Ryan to Marissa, and Marissa to Ryan.

"Marissa, he's sick. He has cancer Marissa." Seth said sadly.

Marissa sat there for a few seconds.

"Marissa, you there?" Seth asked.

"Yea, yea, I'm here. I just….what do you want me to do?" she asked truthfully.

"Marissa, it's Ryan. Your Ryan."

"He used to be my Ryan. He hasn't been my Ryan in ten years, Seth." Marissa said sternly.

"I know. I know. But he's sick."

"Has it spread yet?" she asked.

"Yea. There are a few treatment options. None of them have a great percentage of curing him, and they're gonna be difficult." Seth told her.

Marissa sighed "What do you want me to do, Seth?"

"You know what I want….you know what Summer wants." Seth paused "You know what you want."

"It's been ten years, Seth. I just can't come back to Newport."

"Why?" Seth asked "Why not?"

Marissa didn't say anything.

"Exactly!" Seth said "Please Marissa, we all want you back."

Jake walked into the living room "Mom, Noah's mom is on the phone, she wants to talk to you."

"I have to go, Seth."

"Say yes." Seth said hurriedly "Say you'll come. I'll buy the plane tickets….this weekend."

"Seth….."

"Please?" Seth begged "Not for me or Ryan….for Summer."

Marissa thought a second "Jake does have a week off next week."

"So that's a yes?" Seth asked.

"Fine." Marissa grinned "Bye Seth."


	2. The Picture

Marissa and Jake got to the Newport airport a bit early, so they decided to go to the café and wait for Seth and Summer there. Jake was busy playing PacMan across from the café, so Marissa sat and watched as the people walked by. She hated airports, she hated waiting in airports, who doesn't? She stood up to walk over to Jake, when a man walked up to her. She almost dropped her coffee when she saw him, taller and older looking, but still so handsome. The boy standing in front of her was the boy that she first truly loved and cared about. The boy who took time to break down her walls, the boy who saw behind her façade. The boy who told her he'd love her forever.

"Ryan." She barely got the name out, looking at the man standing in front of her.

Jake walked up behind Marissa and smiled at Ryan "Hi, I'm Jake."

Ryan let out a small smile "Hey Jake, I'm Ryan." He put out his hand and Jake shook it "Nice to meet you."

Ryan didn't take his eyes off of Marissa though "You look great." He said quietly to her.

"Thanks." She whispered, looking at the ground.

"Marissa!" Seth ran up and gave her a hug "Look at you! You look great!" he said happily.

"Seth!" Jake squealed. He hadn't seen Seth or Summer in over two years. They used to come out at least four times a year to visit Marissa and him, but everything has been so busy they hadn't gotten a chance to visit.

"Let's get your bags and get on the road, we can catch up in the car." Seth said, walking towards baggage claim, Jake following. Ryan and Marissa waited back a second.

"How have you been?" Ryan asked, looking into her eyes intently.

"Pretty good." She said shakily.

"Good." He said 'Let's get to the car." He started to walk towards Seth and Jake. She watched him a second before following too.

Once the four got into the car, Seth's phone rang.

"Summer." Seth said cheerfully when he answered the phone.

"You better have a really good explanation to why you should've been home 2 hours ago." She said in lieu of a hello.

"Oh, I do." He told her, looking at Marissa "I'll be home in an hour. You'll love the surprise."

Summer smiled to herself and hung up the phone, she always loves surprises.

Summer waited, not so patiently, in the living room until she heard the front door open.

"Seth! Where's my surprise!" she waddled towards the front door, her hands on her big belly.

"Right here." Marissa stepped into the foyer.

"Coop!" Summer squealed, running as fast as her belly would let her to her best friend "You're here! In my house!"

Marissa laughed "Summer" she wrapped her arms around her best friend "You're huge!" she said, making Summer laugh as tears of joy fell down her face.

"I can't believe you're here." Summer whispered "I missed you so much."

Marissa also let a tear fall "I missed you too Sum, I missed you too."

Everyone sat down for dinner and the boys let Summer and Marissa talk the whole time. After dinner, Jake went to go plan video games with Seth, and Summer was going to take a nap. Of course, Ryan and Marissa were left in the dining room knowing that they were left alone on purpose.

"So." Marissa started "How have you been feeling?"

Ryan shrugged "Hanging in there. Just living every day."

"I'm sorry." She said after a few moments of silence "I'm sorry I left. I'm sorry I never called."

"Me too." Ryan told her truthfully "I missed you so much everyday, but I guess I should've called or something, instead of just brooding every day about it."

"I moved out to Manhattan and I never looked back….but I still regret not looking back, not looking back to you."

Ryan stood up "You wanna take a walk?" he asked

Marissa nodded and they walked out back and down to the beach "I can't believe it's been ten years since I walked on this beach."

'Hard to believe, huh?" he asked quietly, sitting down on the sand and Marissa sat next to him.

"Jake seems like a good kid." He told her.

"Yea, he is." Marissa said, pulling her hair up into a ponytail.

"How old is he?"

'Ten." She said, not looking him in the eye.

Marissa could see the look in his eyes, she sighed "Don't worry Ryan."

After a while of silence, Ryan spoke "Why'd you come back?"

Marissa took a deep breath "It wasn't for you, Ryan. It was for Summer, she's my best friend and I needed to see her."

Ryan leaned in and kissed her ever so lightly on the lips.

"Ryan" she whispered after a moment "We….we can't."

"Why?" he whispered in her ear.

"We're not kids anymore. I have a son and a life, we can't do this" she told him, grazing her lip with her finger.

"You're afraid you'll lose me again." He told her.

Marissa sighed "Ryan, I lost you ten years ago." She said, although he could hear a certain tenderness in her voice.

"Did you ever want me back?" he asked her.

"Of course. Everyday." She told him "But there's nothing we can do about it now."

"Yes, there is." He leaned over and kissed her again, but this time she didn't decline, she kissed him back, knowing all the while what a bad idea this was, but not caring.

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"Coop?" Summer walked into the kitchen around midnight "Where have you been?" she looked at Marissa who was closing the back door quietly and then noticed Ryan, pulling out of the driveway. Summer smiled widely "Did you sleep with him?" she squealed, bouncing over to Marissa.

Marissa let out a slight smile.

"Coop!" she squeezed her best friend.

"Where's Jake?" Marissa asked.

"In bed." Summer said "In the guestroom."

"I'm gonna check on him and get to bed." Marissa said, giving Summer a hug "Goodnight."

"Night Coop." Summer said to Marissa.

Marissa slowly opened the door to the guestroom where Jake was sleeping, but when she walked in, she realized Jake was wide awake in bed, holding something in his hand.

"Honey, what are you still doing it?" Marissa asked.

Jake sat up and handed his mom the picture he was holding and Marissa closed her eyes.

"When you told me about him I found the picture of you two." Jake said quietly to his mother "Why didn't you tell me Mom? Why didn't you tell me that he's my dad?"


	3. The Baby

Marissa sat silently on the bed, not knowing what to say "It wasn't the right time, sweetheart. I was gonna tell you, eventually."

Jake ignored his mom and turned towards the wall.

Marissa sighed and leaned over, kissing him on the head, before going to bed.

In the morning, Marissa woke up early ad walked out to the kitchen where Summer was reading a magazine.

"Morning." Marissa said, getting a cup of coffee and sitting next to her best friend.

"How'd you sleep?" Summer asked, flipping through the magazine.

"Terrible." Marissa said "Jake knows."

Summer put down the magazine and looked at Marissa "Is he mad?"

Marissa nodded; she knew coming here was a mistake.

"Oh honey." Summer hugged Marissa "So, what are you gonna do about Ryan?"

Marissa sighed "I have no idea." 

"Speaking of." Summer looked towards the front door. Ryan and Seth had gone for a run early and were just getting back.

"Morning." The boys said at the same time.

Seth walked over towards Summer and put his arms out.

"Don't even think about it." Summer said with a slight smile "Go take a shower."

"Only if you come with me." Seth said, stepping closer towards her.

Summer laughed "Don't be discreet or anything Cohen. Anyways, I have to make breakfast."

Marissa smiled "I can handle that."

Summer followed Seth upstairs, and a second later, Jake came down.

"Morning buddy." Marissa said, not sure what Jake would say. Especially since Ryan was standing five feet away from Marissa.

"Morning Mom. Hi Ryan." Jake wouldn't look Ryan or Marissa in the eyes.

"Cereal sound good?" Marissa asked.

Jake nodded and sat at the counter.

"How about you?" she asked Ryan.

"Yea, thanks." He said, sitting next to Jake. Ryan couldn't figure out why Marissa was practically ignoring him.

"Seth and I were gonna go surfing, you wanna come?" Ryan asked Jake.

Jake smiled slightly "Sure. I'm not very good though."

"That's okay. We'll teach you." Ryan promised "As long as it's okay with your Mom." 

Jake looked at his Mom for approval and she nodded.

"Jake honey, when you're done with your cereal why don't you run upstairs and get dressed, I'm gonna talk to Ryan for a bit." Marissa said as Jake was finishing up.

Ryan looked curiously at Marissa and watched her carefully as she cleaned the rest of the dishes.

After Jake went upstairs, Marissa walked outside, motioning for Ryan to follow. They went in the backyard to the guesthouse, and went inside. Marissa looked around, it looked the same as she remembered. She thought back to all the time she spent in here with Ryan.

"Is everything okay?" Ryan asked as Marissa sat on the edge of the bed, he sat next to her.

Marissa took a deep breath, she'd never been this scared in her life "You're probably gonna hate me for the rest of your life, and I don't blame you……remember though that I love you, I always have. I ran because I didn't know what else to do, I didn't want to ruin your life, I thought it was best for the both of us." She stopped.

"Marissa…" Ryan wanted her to go on.

"I lied to you yesterday….about Jake." Marissa said, tears welling up in her eyes.

"What do you mean?" Ryan asked, knowing where this was going.

Marissa wiped the tears from her face "He's yours Ryan. Jake is your son."

Ryan didn't move for a few seconds, and then he got up and walked out.

Marissa sat on the bed for a while, wondering whether what she just did was the right thing to do.

"Mom!" Jake ran out to the pool house and opened the door.

Marissa stood up, wiping the tears from her eyes "What is it? What's wrong?"

"Summer's having the baby!" Jake said.

Marissa ran into the kitchen where Seth was running around frantically.

"Jake, grab the baby bag and go out to the car. Call Ryan too. Seth…." She tried to figure out how to calm him down "You go with Jake, I'll get Summer."

Summer was sitting on the couch, breathing heavily "Coop, we have to go."

Marissa helped Summer stand and walked her out to the car.

"Seth's more hysterical then I am." Summer laughed as Seth opened the car door and helped get her into the car.

"I know." Marissa laughed "Jake, hop in the front, we're not letting Seth drive."

"Great idea." Summer said as Seth was breathing heavier then her.

"Deep breaths Summer. In and out." Seth repeated over and over again, making everyone else in the car laugh.

Luckily, there wasn't any traffic and they were at the hospital in no time. They got Summer checked in and in a room. The doctor let Marissa and Jake stay in the room with Summer and Seth for a while.

"You called Ryan, right?" Marissa asked Jake.

'Yea. When we got in the car." Jake answered.

Marissa walked outside and called Ryan again. No answer. She knew Ryan, and she knew exactly where he was.

She walked back in the hospital and told Summer and Seth she'd be back in about a half hour, before jumping in the car and driving to the beach. She knew that Ryan had to be at the beach, at 'their spot'. Sure enough, that's where he was. She slipped off her shoes and left them by the car, walked over towards Ryan, who was sitting against the lifeguard stand.

"I figured I'd find you here." Marissa sat next to him. He ignored her "I know you hate me right now, but Summer's having her baby, she needs you there. Seth too."

"I know, I got Jake's message." Ryan said, not looking her in the face "You know, when I found out about the cancer, one of the main reasons I knew I had to fight it was to see my godchild. Seth and Summer told me they couldn't raise the baby on their own and they needed me to help, and I couldn't let the cancer take over my body, because the baby needed me. And when I got Jake's message, all I though about was how you were alone with him for all those years. No one was there to help you."

"Ryan…." Marissa said quietly.

"Maybe if I called, I would've known. But I didn't call and because I didn't call or visit, you had to raise a child by yourself, in an unfamiliar place and…."

"Ryan, stop." Marissa took his hand "Don't blame yourself for not being there. I should've told you, I just didn't want to ruin your life. Do not ever blame yourself, understand? I'm so, so sorry I never told you. I thought about calling you every day for ten years. I didn't have the courage to do it though, and I regret that. And I know that you hate me—"

Ryan cut her off "I could never hate you Marissa. I sat here the past two hours trying to convince myself that I did, but I can't hate you, I love you too much."

Marissa stood up "We have to get back to the hospital."

Ryan and Marissa drove silently back to the hospital and walked into the waiting room where Jake was watching television.

"How's she doing?" Marissa asked Jake.

"If you consider screaming good, then good." Jake said, concentrating on the movie.

"Don't go anywhere, okay? I'll be out to check on you in a bit." Marissa told Jake as she walked towards Summer's room, Ryan following.

"Coop!" Summer screamed, squeezing Seth's hand.

Marissa and Ryan couldn't help but laugh at Seth's face. He looked like he was in more pain then Summer was, from her squeezing his hand.

"In and out. In and out." He repeated.

"The doctor said the baby's coming soon." Summer said in between contractions.

Marissa and Ryan walked to the other side of Summer and Marissa took her hand.

Another contraction came and Summer screamed again.

"In and out." Seth said once more.

"Shut up Cohen!" Summer screamed "This is all your fault!"

"What is?" Cohen asked

"Maybe if you kept your hands off of me I wouldn't be a freakin' balloon that's about to pop!" she screamed, making Ryan, Marissa, and Seth all laugh.

"Stop laughing! I'm in pain!" she yelled at them.

The doctor came in and told Summer it was time. She wanted Ryan and Marissa in the room with her too.

After about twenty minutes, Summer took a deep breath and let it out when she heard a small cry.

The doctor cleaned the baby and handed the baby back to Summer, wrapped in a pink blanket.

"Congratulations." The doctor said "I'll leave you guys alone. The nurse will be in in a bit."

Summer started to cry as she looked at the beautiful baby girl in her arms. Ryan and Marissa quietly left and went out into the waiting room to give Seth and Summer time with their new little girl.

"She's beautiful." Seth stroked Summer's hair and used his other hand to hold his little girl's hand lightly.

"She's so little." Summer said, not taking her eyes off of her.

"So, does she have a name?" Seth asked.

"Bridget Grace Cohen." Summer said happily.

"That's a beautiful name." Seth told his wife, kissing her forehead. "For a beautiful little girl."


	4. I Want You

Ryan walked into Summer and Seth's to see the baby, but when he found Bridget, she was in Marissa's arms, sleeping quietly

Ryan walked into Summer and Seth's to see the baby, but when he found Bridget, she was in Marissa's arms, sleeping quietly. Marissa was in the nursery, rocking Bridget in her arms and humming quietly. Ryan leaned against the doorway and smiled, watching her quietly.

When Marissa saw Ryan, she put the baby into her crib and walked out into the hallway, closing the door to the nursery quietly.

"Summer and Seth are in their room, they needed a break for a few hours." Marissa whispered to Ryan as they walked downstairs into the kitchen.

"You're good with Bridget." Ryan said with a smile, sitting next to her at the counter.

"Well, I've had some experience." Marissa said to him.

Ryan nodded, and looked at her "Um, I don't know if this is gonna be weird, but they have that charity dinner tomorrow at the Yacht Club, and I was wondering if you wanted to go with me? You know…as friends."

Marissa thought for a second then turned to him "Yea, I'd love too."

"Hey Ryan." Jake walked in from the backyard where he was playing basketball.

"Hey Jake, whatcha doing?" Ryan asked as Jake sat next to him.

"Nothing. Mom, I'm bored." Jake put his head on the counter.

"What do you want to do?" Marissa asked.

"Hmmm." Jake thought for a second.

"I have a friend who has some extra tickets to the Lakers game in a few hours. I wasn't gonna go but if you and your mom wanna come…" Ryan offered.

Jake looked at his mom "Please Mom!" he begged "Please, please, please!"

Marissa looked at Ryan "You're sure?"

Ryan smiled "Positive."

"Go upstairs and get showered and dressed" she told Jake.

"Yes!" Jake jumped up.

"Don't wake the baby." Marissa warned as Jake tiptoed upstairs.

"Thanks." Marissa said to Ryan.

Jake sat in the middle of Ryan and Marissa the whole game, enjoying every minute of it. Every few minutes, Marissa would catch Ryan looking at her, but she tried to ignore it.

"Ready to go?" Ryan asked at the end of the game.

Jake, who was extremely tired, nodded "Yep."

Marissa and Ryan got onto the main highway, and were stuck in bumper to bumper traffic. Jake was asleep in the backseat, and Marissa turned on the radio.

'Well folks' the announcer said 'It looks like there is a 20 car pileup on I-405. So if you're heading that way, don't be expecting to move anytime in the next few hours.'

Marissa sighed, knowing there was no other way to get home "Well, what are we gonna do?"

Ryan turned off the exit they were sitting near "Holiday Inn?" he asked.

Marissa shrugged "I guess we don't really have a choice."

Ryan went in to get a room, and Marissa woke Jake up and walked with him inside. By the time they got to their room, Jake was wide awake "Can we rent a movie?" he asked "I saw the movie store right across the street."

Ryan smiled "Sure buddy, I'll walk you over."

"Thanks." Marissa said as Ryan and Jake left the room. She sat on the bed, looking at the fact that it was a very, very small room with a king size bed. Her phone rang a few minutes later "Hello?"

"Coop!" Summer whispered happily "Shouldn't you be home by now?"

"Yea, well there was a pileup on the Interstate so we're staying at a hotel tonight." Marissa explained.

"You and Ryan?" Summer asked "In a room together…allllll night."

"Not helping Summer." Marissa said with slight laughter in her voice.

"Wasn't trying to Coop. Well, I guess a night in a hotel is a start." Summer said.

"For what?" Marissa asked.

"You and Ryan."

"Jake's here." Marissa reminded her best friend.

"Oh yea." Summer said as Marissa heard Bridget start to coo "I have to go. Have fun tonight. Tell the boys I said hi."

"Will do. See you in the morning." Marissa hung up the phone as Ryan and Jake walked back in the room.

"We got Pirates!" Jake showed his mother the movie and popped it into the television. Jake sat at the end of the bed, close to the television, but Marissa was sitting against the headboard and Ryan came and sat next to her. Sure enough, just as Marissa predicted, Jake was asleep in a few minutes.

"So much for that rental." Ryan said as Marissa put a blanket over Jake and slipped off his shoes. "You did great with him, you know."

Marissa shrugged "I don't know sometimes. He's a good kid though."

"He has a great mom."

Marissa smiled and Ryan slowly moved a bit closer to her "Thanks for today. He had a great time."

"And what about you?"

"Me too." Marissa told him.

"When you came out here, did you ever think we might be able to start again?" Ryan asked

Marissa sat up "Ryan….I don't know." She wasn't happy he brought it up.

"You can't tell me you never thought about it."

"I did, okay Ryan? I thought about it everyday for the past ten years. I've thought about you, and maybe if I called we could talk, and maybe we could get back together. But it's just too hard."

"What is Marissa? Relationships are _always _going to be hard. I mean, if they were easy then everyone would have that one person they love forever, but it doesn't work like that." Ryan said, locking his eyes with hers "And yes, I know that we never were the most functional couple but we got by because we loved each other. I'm tired of not going after what I want Marissa, and I want you. I've always wanted you since the first time we met."

Marissa leaned in closer and kissed him lightly, then more passionately. It wasn't just a kiss though, it was the kind of kiss people share when they are falling for each other…..again.


End file.
